Today I wanted to share the book from Rachel Hollis, Girl Stop Apologizing. This is the book which I recommend to all women who are entrepreneurs, working in an organization, stay at home moms… single ladies!
Why? – This is the type of conversation I would have with my close friends or the conversations that Sex and the City ladies would have, like for example Miranda or Charlotte were struggling to be a mom, and work, and marriage, and personal dreams.
This is the type of book, that made me feel I am not alone, and it is ok to dream, it is ok to fail, and it is ok to ask for help.
This book has the full acknowledgment of we actually feel with no shame, but better is the advice to structure a plan to drive our goals. For me, it is working well, at first I felt like, Awe…ok…so I am not a bad mom…!! I need to think about my plan!
There were 2 chapters that actually impacted me the most:
Excuse #3 – I don’t have time
This is the biggest trap for me. Me and my husband are the biggest supporters of each other, but we are really bad about organizing our time, and now with 2 children, and no support from close family, it is being a daily challenge.
Also, we are both dreamers, and we have so many projects, that is impossible to keep up without arguing who is picking up the baby to daycare. The other day it was almost closing time, like 6pm, and we were back and forward in the phone, it is not my day, it is yours!! Of course, we got late and the baby was the last child to be picked, and she was sat with the room teacher, in the office. Plus we got a warning that next time we will be charged by each minute late $1!!!
After this, we decided to follow a simple thing mentioned in the book. Give time to do weekly schedule. We are doing it, it takes like 1 hour or so on Sunday, and it is worth it! Last week, I thank my husband, for him dropping the baby at daycare so I could go to an earlier meeting in the office, scheduled last minute. As it was my turn I felt I had to thank him to support me, instead of having the type of words, you have to because I need to attend this meeting, as it is so important, or I lose my job!
I have to tell…it was kind of sexy, this smile back from him, telling me, It is ok! 🙂
Then the other thing it was to embrace the ME time. Means if I want to develop my personal projects, like my blog and my coaching certification, I need to set some time in the week, as my sacred hours. Since last month I am having: Tuesdays and Wednesdays after work, those are my sacred ours!
Excuse #8 – What will they think
This is another trap of mine.
I always think about what the others are thinking of me. And if I think deeply, I believe it is cultural, or the environment I was raised. I always had my mom saying to me, “Don’t laugh too loud, the others will think you aren’t a well-behaved girl”.
This one is not an easy one, as it is been years and years of living what the others are thinking, and afraid to be categorized in a box that I don’t want to, and not fitting in…it is a lot!
But Rachel Hollis did a flowchart about other people’s opinions, and I am an engineer… I love flowcharts!
And as you can see, all the boxes go to a conclusion: Don’t Worry!