Last weekend one of my visits to Barnes&Noble, I found a book unexpectedly, and had one of these good surprises of finding a good book that I didn’t hear about before! I always get so happy when that happens…and also get a little bit of the FOMO (fear of missing out) feeling! 🙂
The book is “How Women Rise” by Sally Helgesen and Marshal Goldsmith. The book talks about the 12 behaviors that women have which hold them back in their career:
- Habit 1 – Reluctance to claim your achievements
- Habit 2 – Expect others to spontaneously notice and reward your contribution
- Habit 3 – Overvaluing expertise
- Habit 4 – Building rather than leveraging relationships
- Habit 5 – Failing to enlist allies from day one
- Habit 6 – Putting your job before your career
- Habit 7 – The perfection trap
- Habit 8 – The disease to please
- Habit 9 – Minimizing
- Habit 10 – Too much
- Habit 11 – Ruminating
- Habit 12 – Letting your radar distract you
Not surprising at first when I read the list of habits described in the book. Most of the behaviors are discussed in some of the forums of women where I participate. But when reading habit #6 that made me think and it was a bit surprising!
Quote from the book: “Jobs are stepping-stones on the way to something else. There is no shame in using where you are to position yourself for what you want next.”
This is it!
This is the reason that I am 14 years in the same company and never had an invite for a job that I really wanted to. I only start to talk to people and look after what is available at the moment when I am ready to move on. This means when I start the conversations with someone I already expect something from them and the anxiety increases. My learning curve in my current role is at the top, and I checked out already!
We cant checked out while we are in a role… naturally the performance decreases!
Outperforming in a role is the perfect timing to look after other roles, there is no stress for the opportunity to come, shows maturity and higher self-awareness, also will attract more people who want to help.
Watch out: the statement I am so happy where I am, I love what I do, is not enough!! Add also, I am learning so much and will be prepared for my future next step… sounds much better! YES!!! Who dares to do this? I don’t know women who do this…and honestly, I can predict listening even within the women saying, “Just started this role, already thinking in the next one!”
This is big learning! Doing a great job and look after the career means vision!
“The world needs ambitious women! WHY NOT YOU?”