Yesterday I was discussing with my husband the fact that he needs to help me more, he needs to be more active in the organization of our family schedule, and I was complaining that I would like to have more time.
I work full time, have 2 children and since we moved to New Jersey not having family close by to support, it is being harder…especially when I hear that at the end of day my husband goes to the gym and…I don’t…actually I don’t feel like…I prefer to stay at home be with my baby and prepare her for nighttime.
I don’t know…I get mad, because I say I need to have time, but for the other hand I don’t feel like to give up of this role as the Home Lead!
Yesterday my husband said: “The superwoman needs to end”.
…”WHAT??!!”…seriously didn’t get it at first.
But today after 24 hours of reflection I believe it is so true!
“The Superwoman needs to end!”
Every time I talk with some friends and women that in a certain stage of their career where they need to manage a more demanding career progression and growing the family, often they say they don’t want to pursue the career, dropping complete from the workplace or even be part-time. I am not saying they aren’t happy, but I believe this is a natural unconscious bias.
I believe good companies are providing better conditions which will help women, like giving flexibility at work, extended maternity leave, time off for family support, etc.
BUT….The MINDSET needs to change…
This is the most difficult one…the women are still the primary leads of the family, even if the men cook, and pick the children from daycare…
I feel we are so far for a change and the numbers are showing that. I feel we are arriving to a place which we are comfortable of the equal opportunities during childhood, college and starting a career. So much that women feel empowered to make their own decisions, like dropping the careers because they prefer to give time to their family…don’t men want the same?
I listened this week from a female new hire, just graduate in our department, saying she is so lucky because she lives with her boyfriend and he does all the grocery and cooking, preparing her lunch bag.
Why is this young lady lucky?
Why does she feel she is lucky?
We don’t listen the young male hires saying such thing! Imagine a young man saying that they are lucky to have a great girlfriend who does all the cooking and grocery shopping!!!!
I found an article from The New York Times by Claire Cain Miller, which brings a great perspective, and also give data:
“Women in business start out equal to men in terms of jobs and pay. But at each level, they disappear. Only 22 percent of senior vice presidents are women. And of those, just 21 percent have roles related to generating revenue, which generally lead to C-level jobs, according to the annual Women in the Workplace study by Lean In and McKinsey. The drop-off starts with the first promotion to management: Women are 18 percent less likely to be promoted to manager than their male peers.”
Why women always question themselves Work or Family?…”The Superwoman needs to end”.
Now comes the question…HOW?